3:08 a.m. A tree branch scraping against the roof startled me awake. A half hour later, I was repeating mentally “Be … Still” with each breathe in and out. It was a fall-back-asleep technique I’d adopted years ago when work pressures, elder care worries, and teenage challenges robbed my nights.
But on this night the technique failed me and the Ghost of Yesterday took over. That inner voice, chastising me that I should have finished the proposal yesterday; should have worked out more this month; should have gotten more summer projects done; should have – should have – should have. For over an hour, the reel of should-haves played vividly as yesterday’s ghost narrated where I fell short.
4:23 a.m. I’d been dozing off and on until I glanced at the house alarm panel. The light wasn’t on. Hmm. Why would that be? I’m sure I set it, didn’t I? My eyes wandered to the shadowy corner of the room, (continue reading →)